Undefined Expectations Cause Hurt
Fresh Manna 2010 By Pastor Tim Burt
I have a thought for you to ponder today. I often tell people that as a church, we can’t meet expectations that have not been defined or made known. Sometimes people get sick and end up in the hospital. If they tell us that that is happening or that they will be having surgery, etc., we can pray for and with them, visit them, and minister to them. But if we don’t know about it and they have this expectation, we will fail because they have failed to communicate it to us.
People often have unspoken (and subconsciously) undefined expectations for their job, marriage, church, etc. It is a common failure of communication that even some of the most skilled communicators fail at. Undefined expectations are almost never fulfilled but are instead disappointed and the one who takes the fall for them is the one that undefined expectations are pointed at. For example, let’s say your boss wants something from your performance. It’s just a feeling he has inside and as a result something he wants but has never defined for himself nor spoken of with you about. He’s not even totally aware that he has these expectations but he does. It exists within him.
Expectations exist within everyone, and because your boss hasn’t thought out and defined his expectations of you—much less let you know of them—you are unable to meet them. You may be shocked when one day they surface out of his frustration of unmet expectations. You think or even say to him, “Why didn’t you tell me you wanted this? I could have worked toward that goal or helped meet your expectation.” He may feel that you should have been able to figure it out. Consequence: his undefined expectation results in your failure. This is one of the most repeated failures in communication—and one many seldom learn how to fix.
Many people carry around unreasonable expectations. They feel frustrated and they don’t know why. They want something but haven’t taken the time to figure out what. Then they want people to meet an expectation they can’t even define for themself.
Expectations should be thought out so they are reasonable and clear, then they can help people that they point these (subconscious) expectations at.
I talk with couples that are angry with their spouses over things they’ve either never communicated or had unreasonable expectations over. Expectations should not be demands—they should be goals or targets of what you shoot for. They should be reasonable because it’s not always easy for those they direct them toward to meet them.
God is the giver of reasonable expectations. They are filled with hope, love, mercy and patience toward us. Psalm 62:5 says, “I wait quietly before God, for my expectations come from Him.” He is clear in communicating them. You are so thankful that He is so clear and patient in His expectations with you. Likewise He wants you to be so with others.
Here is a simple way I walk this out. When I feel frustrated about anything I ask myself; “Have I clearly defined and communicated my expectation that I’m feeling frustrated over with the person(s) I am frustrated with?” If not, it’s my bad. I need to ask God to forgive me and ask Him to help me form reasonable expectations and then clearly work toward communicating them and helping the one I have the expectation toward, understand them and meet them.
Proverbs 23:18 “For then there will surely be a future for you and your expectation shall not be cut off.”
In His love,
Pastor Tim
Published by Pastor Tim Burt
Copyright© 2010 Tim Burt, All rights reserved.
http://readfreshmanna.blogspot.com
“NO RESPECT!”
DAILY-E-VOTIONAL
BLESSINGS FROM THE HEART
Pastor Cecil A. Thompson
Proverbs 22:6 “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.”
Perhaps we have all encountered a situation such as I experienced a few days ago. As I pulled into the parking lot of a super market, I noticed an empty space across from where I had parked. I noticed a car pause near the space, then drive on. I walked over and sure enough, there was a shopping cart that some thoughtless person had left in the middle of the parking space instead of returning it to the cart storage area a few steps away. (I returned it clear into the store).
My mind began to reflect upon this and other types of inconsiderate behavior that seems to be the norm of our modern life. Someone recently sent a u-tube video of a wonderful rendition of our national anthem. I was enjoying the remarkable talent when I happened to observe the players lined up on the edge of the playing surface. They slouched, talked and never paid honor. It was distressing!
What is the reason for this breakdown in respect and appropriate behavior? I think the answer is to be found in today’s Scripture. Parents have delegated their God given responsibility for training their children to the church, school or just not caring enough to take the time to train their children in the way they should go.
So what can we do? If we have children, train them Biblical patterns of behavior. Try as best as you can to develop godly character qualities. If you do not have children of your own, pray for God to show you kids that need you. Then share from your heart the things that God shows you.
Blessings dear hearts. Draw near to God today, trust Him completely and be a blessing!
- – - Pastor Cecil
P.P.S. – You can find previous E-Votionals covering a variety of Scriptures and topics to help you in your walk with the Lord at www.Daily-E-Votional.com
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“a merry heart doeth good like a medicine” Prov 17:22
GA homeless congregation serves others
Charlie Butts – OneNewsNow – 3/6/2010 4:15:00 AM
Rescue Atlanta is a church that focuses on inner city residents and the homeless, and their approach is unique and effective.
About 85 percent of the congregation members are homeless, and the average Sunday usually begins with serving about 2,000 meals before worship service. Rescue Atlanta spokesperson Katie Rolls-Palmer tells OneNewsNow that teams of volunteers among the homeless not only handle numerous chores, they also tithe.
“Our people give; they give and they give,” she assures. “We support, I believe it’s 18 or 19 missionaries…ourselves. Even though we are missionaries, we teach our people to give.”
The church members have adopted children in Haiti and support an orphanage in Kenya, she continues — and they also did some traveling to help in New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina.
“They would just work for free and they would find people who had been scammed or struggling,” Palmer explains. “And then when we had the flooding here in Georgia, our guys immediately were [saying], ‘Pastor Mel, when are we going? Pastor Mel, we’re ready, we’re ready.’”
Pastor Mel Rolls led crews of homeless to Austell, Georgia, to gut homes inundated by 12 feet of water and remove debris. People who had nothing were helping those who had lost everything. Rescue Atlanta operates on the edge financially, but Palmer reports that God has always provided.
LACKING KNOWLEDGE
Thought FOR TODAY
A HEBREW SAGE MIGHT SAY. . .
When a clever man makes a mistake. . . does he ever make a mistake!
LACKING KNOWLEDGE
“MY people are destroyed for lack of knowledge, destroyed because of your disobedience! Because you have rejected knowledge and spurned the Law (teachings) of your GOD, I reject you as MY priest. I, in turn, will spurn your children.” [Hosea (Hoshea) 4. 6 Tanakh, Nevi'im]
This grievous bewailing lament applies to all nations nowadays. Though they once knew the MAGNIFICENT GOD OF ISRAEL, apostasy and humanism has taken over and has hardened the hearts of the masses. Therefore, the supporting principle of “reaping what one sows” is well-founded and appropriate. Parents and grandparents in today’s world are seeing the awful scourge of moral debauchery (wickedness, dishonesty, betrayal) among their children and the young people. And, the shackles of wickedness are tightening because “you have forgotten the Law of your God.”
GODly knowledge is rejected throughout the human race, therefore people are being “destroyed for lack of knowledge” and their willful disobedience. This ignorance exists despite an abundance of supposed actual knowledge (science) in our educational institutions, for the ALMIGHTY CREATOR has been outlawed. The intellectuals (?) of the day have forgotten that “the fear of the LORD is the beginning (best part) of knowledge” they are fools who despise wisdom and instruction. [Proverbs (Mishle) 1. 7 Tanakh, Kethuvim]
“The beginning of wisdom is the fear of the LORD, and knowledge of QADOSHYM (the HOLY ONE) is understanding.” [Proverbs (Mishle) 9. 10 Tanakh, Kethuvim]
Even in the churches, to our mortifying and embarrassing shame, there is very little emphasis on knowledge. Instead, the enthusiasm that is endorsed and promoted is for an experience and/or entertainment. True CHRISTian faith is not a feeling, it is a committed desire to be of one mind and purpose with GOD SUPREME. To have an intellectual understand the PERSON and work of the LORD MESSIAH YESHUA, the BREAD OF DELIVERANCE, one must first have a reverential fear of the LORD, that is the beginning of knowledge. [Proverbs/Mishle 1. 7] HE taught imperatively:
“unless you repent you will all likewise perish.”<strong> [Luke 13. 5]
To believe right, one must first think right, and this requires finding GODly knowledge, discretion and discernment. “All who separated themselves from the peoples of the lands to follow the Law of GOD,everyone who had knowledge to understand, joind with their noblebrothers, and took an oath with sanctions to follow GOD’S Law, given through Moses the servant of GOD, and to observe carefully all the commandments of ELOHEYM ADONEYNOV (the LORD our LORD), HIS rules (ordinances) and laws (statutes).” [Nehemiah (Nechemah) 10. 28 - 29 Tanakh, Kethuvim]
“Hear the WORD OF THE LORD, O people of Israel! For the LORD has a case against the inhabitants of this land, because there is no truth or mercy, no knowledge or obedience to GOD in the land.” [Hosea (Hoshea) 4. 1 Tanakh, Nevi'im]
“They sow wind, and they shall reap the whirlwind.” [Hosea (Hoshea) 8. 7 Tanakh, Nevi'im] The people and the land are bewildered, entirely consumed; like an unwanted vessel in which there is no pleasure.
“You therefore, beloved, since you know this beforehand, beware lest you also fall from your own steadfastness, being led away with the error of the wicked; but grow in the grace and knowledge of our LORD and SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST. To HIM be the glory both now and forever, Amen” [2 Peter 3. 17 - 18]
Sha’alu (Pray) for the Shalom (Peace) of Jerusalem and all of Israel!
Renew my strength and draw me nearer to YOU, GLORIOUS GOD OF TRUTH – allow me to serve YOU and be YOUR friend, be my GOD and I will not be afraid; I will sing with a contented heart and am joyously blessed with salvation.
Praying for the peace of Jerusalem is praying for the return of Messiah Jesus and His Kingdom.
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Please visit our web page for teachings on Bible texts and subjects.
Also notice the section showing the disparity between the Holy Bible and the Muslim Koran.
The newest section is our thought by thought study through the Bible. Having completed the Torah (books of Moses), and the New Testament, we are now going through the book of; [1 Samuel].
How Can I Get Over My Husband’s Death?
Q: My husband died several months ago (of cancer), and they have been the hardest months of my life. People try to cheer me up by saying he’s in heaven now, and I believe it, but it doesn’t take away the hurt. How can I get over this? — Mrs. E.W.
A: Have you ever had major surgery? If so, you know it took a long time to recover from it — months, even years. Something traumatic had happened to your body, and it healed only gradually.
This is similar to what happens when a loved one is taken from us. Something traumatic has happened: A loved one has been removed from our lives, and our emotional pain is very real. And just as it takes a long time to recover from physical surgery, so it takes a long time to recover from the “emotional surgery” of a loved one’s death. In fact, we may never fully recover; I miss my late wife every day, and I’m sure I’ll continue to miss her until we are reunited in heaven.
Grief is real; even Jesus wept at the tomb of His friend Lazarus (see John 11:33-35). But when we know Christ, we have hope — hope for ourselves, and hope for those who have entered heaven before us. Take time each day to thank God for His goodness in giving you so many years together, and for the hope we have of heaven because of Jesus Christ.
But ask God also to help you reach out to others who are grieving (perhaps in your church). They need your friendship — and as you encourage them, your own grief will lessen. The Bible says,
“Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn” (Romans 12:15).
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Send your queries to “My Answer,” c/o Billy Graham, Billy Graham Evangelistic Association, 1 Billy Graham Parkway, Charlotte, N.C., 28201; call 1-(877) 2-GRAHAM, or visit the Web site for the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association: www.billygraham.org.
Three paramedics were boasting
Three paramedics were boasting about improvements in their respective ambulance team’s response times.
“Since we installed our new satellite navigation system,” bragged the first one, “we cut our emergency response time by ten percent.”
The other paramedics nodded in approval. “Not bad,” the second paramedic commented. “But by using a computer model of traffic patterns, we’ve cut our average response time by 20 percent.”
Again, the other team members gave their congratulations, until the third paramedic said, “That’s nothing! Since our ambulance driver passed the bar exam, we’ve cut our emergency response time in half!”
Ignoring The Warnings
(By Rocky Henriques, www.timothyreport.com)
Police say an Asiatic black bear bit off a woman’s fingers recently (March 2010) at Lincoln Park Zoo in Manitowoc, Wisconsin after she ignored barriers and warning signs to try to feed the animal. The 47-year-old grandmother lost a thumb and a forefinger, and two other fingers were partially severed. Alcohol may have been a factor.
Sometimes you just have to wonder about folks. With all the warning and caution signs around, you would think that the woman would have realized trying to feed the bears with her bare hands was not a smart thing to do. Even without the warning signs, she should have known better!
Which leads me to wonder: how many times have I ignored the warning signs God has placed in front of me? How often do I just casually go on my merry way, thinking that of all the people in history, this surely doesn’t apply to me?
When God speaks a word of warning to our spirits, we should pay close attention. When God says “Don’t” it’s not because He’s trying to steal our fun. It’s because He always knows what is best, and is trying to steer us away from the bear cages of our lives.
Keep your fingers where they belong! But most importantly – keep your heart pure by obeying God’s Word.
“How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your word.” (Psalm 119:9 NIV)
Thought for Today
“Until individuals are aware of the gravity of their sin, they will not be awed by the reality of grace.” - Allistair Begg
Rabbis disagree on kosher status of salmon
NEW YORK (UPI) — Jewish bagel lovers in New York said they disagree with a recent ruling by ultra-Orthodox rabbis taking lox, or smoked salmon, off the kosher list.
Chevra Mehadrin, a small group of ultra-Orthodox rabbis centered in Monsey, N.Y., said it added smoked salmon to the list of foods it does not believe should be considered kosher because the fish often contains anisakis, a small parasitic worm, the New York Post reported Monday.
The announcement drew the ire of several Orthodox rabbis in New York.
“This issue has been resolved in Jewish law for hundreds of years already,” said Rabbi Moshe Elefant of the Orthodox Union.
Jewish bagel lovers in the city said they would be disappointed to see the view of salmon as non-kosher become widespread.
“What is a bagel and cream cheese without the lox? It’s nothing,” said Mr. Bagel regular Josh Loberfeld, 29.
Copyright 2010 by United Press International
Who are the sons of God?
For all who are being led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God. For you have not received a spirit of slavery leading to fear again, but you have received a spirit of adoption as sons by which we cry out, “Abba! Father!” The Spirit Himself testifies with our spirit that we are children of God. Romans 8:14-16 NASB